40 years young
My 40th birthday slipped by earlier this fall unceremoniously as planned. There was no trip of a lifetime or big party with friends, no champaign toasts or fancy restaurants (not that those things aren’t wonderful). Entering my 40th year felt like an awakening of sorts as I’ve diligently worked to shed the layers of expectations of who I thought I should be and how I should spend my small speck of time in this world. I wanted to create space to reflect on my life journey so far – what I’ve learned, what I’ve lost, what I’ve done and what my heart tells me there is left to do. But more than that, I wanted to slow down and take in every last sip of the last 40 years, allowing myself to dip into the lifetime of memories I’m fortunate enough to have and examine them in all their complexity and texture. As I continue my descent into the unknown future, I take the many hard-earned lessons and realizations with me, packed in a small suitcase I am choosing to carry with me.
Invest in your relationship with yourself. You are your own best companion.
Seek out and spread love – love for yourself, love for others, love in how you spend your time.
Fill your days with moments that inspire joy in awe in yourself and others.
We are not promised nor owed anything in this lifetime.
Show up not just for other people, but for yourself.
Luck is biggest determining factor in your life. Invite luck in as often as you can by saying yes to opportunities that stretch and even scare you. Take a new way home from work. Break your routine so luck can find you.
Define your own expectations and strive to meet those. You will never meet the expectations of others, especially if they don’t meet their own.
Live your life in such a way that your legacy is how good you made others feel
Time is the only commodity no one can buy. Spend it in the spaces that bring you joy and fulfillment
As parents, we are mere guides. Our children are not us, nor here for us.
Motherhood will swallow you whole if you let it, your entire self-worth wrapped up in the behavior and outcomes of a child. Delineate yourself and your value on more than just your child – you will both buckle under the pressure if you don’t.
Make yourself as uncomfortable as possible. We don’t grow in spaces of ease.
There can be no joy without sadness, no success without failure. Grief, anger, disappointment – these add the depth to our experiences. Don’t be afraid to live in these places and feel them deeply.
Diet isn’t just what you put in your body. Everything you consume influences how you think and feel. Be judicious in what you allow in your space.
Listen to yourself and your knowing. You already have the answers if you can just quiet the noise.
What served you in the past might not be takes you into the future. Thank each accomplishment, milestone, habit, or narrative for supporting and serving you, and lovingly leave it behind.
Find the threads that connect your experiences and work to identify what they are trying to tell you.
I hope 40 is just the beginning, that I get to spend the next years living life even more fully, embracing my purpose and empowering others to do the same. I hope I’m blessed with the opportunity to watch my boys grow up and realize their own small contribution to the tapestry of this lifetime. I’m in awe of this life – the profound, rich, all-encompassing gift we get to surround ourselves with. To being 40 years young.
